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User PrimalKyogre

Member for: 7 months (since Apr 21)
Type: Registered user
Extra privileges: Voting on questions
Voting on answers
Voting posts down
Flagging posts
Posting on user walls
Gender: Male. You have been wronged, all legendaries have genders
Country: Deep under the ocean. I will come up and eat that feebas that took you hours to find
Favorite Pokémon: (In order) Kyogre/Primal Kyogre, Decidueye, Yveltal, Chandelure, Mega Charizard Y, and Articuno
Friend Codes: I’ll be the only person who doesn’t say “I have no friends” here

Porygon-Zangoose, good gimmick sets
Primal Shadow, PorygonZangoose’s brother, shiny hunter
DeltaEmerald, he finally let me kill groudon! Now accepting orders for delicious assorted groudon
TheMagnezone, thanks for the duraladon and coalossal
Dark-Void Z, nice quote wall
I think he’s gone lol
Dragapult, dragapuly that yeets dreepys
Aurora Zapp, nice
Hollow the sylvekyu, i bet $10 I misspelled that
Sheyenge, nice person, awesome friend
~BulbaBruhtm~, c h e s n a u g h t i s e p i c a n d h e a g r e e s
If I you aren’t on here, sorry, not sorry

Join the sCrEeEeEeEeEeEeEeE cult! We sCrEeEeEeEeEeEeEeEeE and uh that’s about it. Requirements to join are secret, so if you for whatever reason want to join, ask me if you fulfill the requirements.
I have spoken in the chat to Pokemaster on October 21st 2020
~~- Put-~- This-~- Ribbon-~- On-~- Your-~- Wall-~- If-~- You-~- Think-~- Umbreon-~- Is-~- Cooler-~- Than-~-Absol-~-
3000 points
About me: please call me Primal.
“Lameheads are everywhere
Gathering N brain farts in a bag
To unleash upon
All the N hating non lameheads
The Gladion cult leader
AKA me grabs an epic sword
Made of Gladion hair
Which cuts of N’s lame head
And the cult celebrates
Cud dis id Bau Triller
Bau Triller noot
Where Lusamine writes parenting books
And is the OG lamehead face
Yoo no dis ids Bau Triller
Bau Triller noot
Hauhead is cheating on his head
With his frocky face
Bat triller twonoot, yea, woo
Guzma’s a psycho
Who beat Gla-Gla in a battle
So I killed him
And declared his body a scree corpse
Which was eaten
By Primal and all the hungry Pokémon
Pika dances with Gla-Gla
Who gets shipped with Hauhead
Which makes me scree
Cud dis Id Bau Triller
X wears his whee pantaloons
And stalks kids in space with Pika
(Ooh, ooh)
Bau Triller, Bau Triller noot
Wit hid feece, Bau Triller twonoot
Hau is a head lame
With his head being epically eaten
By a Gladion head with Kyogre fins
That flies in the air
As Primal grows Gladion heads, ooh
Lusamine is Giratina’s kid
And she made Groudon and Rayquaza lame
With lamehead happy meals
But her kids were really lucky
Because her lameheaditis
Wasn't passed down at all, yeah
She’s still lame
And always will be forever
And I’m happy
Dat tis id Bau Triller, Bau Triller noot
Where Sun is cute and Moon is lame
And too many OCs are kind and caring
Bau Triller, Bau Triller noot
And team rainbow lollipop rocket boot
Id killed Ed by Bau Triller, epix chilleder
Bau Triller tere twonoot
Cud dis id Bau Triller, Bau Triller noot
Pika is the pinnacle of cute
And too many OCs are kind and caring
(Ooh, ooh)
Bau Triller, Bau Triller noot
Gla-Gla has epic cute masters emotes
Dat eximplode mey brain, Bau Triller
And we whee in the chat
I parodied a parody
Because why the frick not
It’s awesome as heck
Thanks Primal for misspelling Hau
And we whee in the chat
Flareon’s related to a Youtuber
Because I said so is why
I get shipped with half my male friends
And it makes me want to wheescree
And we whee in the chat
(Bau Triller, woo, Bau Triller)
And we whee in the chat
(Bau Triller, woo, Bau Triller)
Ooh, Pika whees in the chat
 Bau Triller noot, Puka
We give zero cruds about N’s lame head
Which implodes in a Lyle face
(Bau Triller noot, Bau Triller
An epic song of whee erupts
From the keyboard of the cults
And we turn in to whee machines
I epically dance in a twirling whee (and we whee in the chat)
And everyone must kill Peta Isis
Por Tey bey wheex buy Bau Triller!
Glazio Kawaii, 2020. BAU TRILLER NOOT SCREE
Seriously people I hate how PK sounds just call me primal gosh darn it
~Join the Kyogre gang~
We hate groudon, we love Kyogre, and we...hate groudon and love Kyogre. Simple.
I quite like Water, Dark, Ghost, and Ice typed Pokémon

Activity by PrimalKyogre

Score: 80 points (ranked #274)
Questions: 1 (1 with best answer chosen)
Answers: 4
Comments: 27
Voted on: 5 questions, 4 answers
Gave out: 8 up votes, 1 down vote
Received: 6 up votes, 0 down votes

Wall for PrimalKyogre

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Today's story is The Aether Company. Woo-hoo.

The Aether Company

One day, N looked through a newspaper. Peta Isis had become bored, and he wanted to do something. But, sadly, nothing caught his eye. He sighed and put down the newspaper, but that's when he noticed something printed on the back of it. It was showing a building, home of a company that had recently opened: the Aether Company. They produced unique Poke Balls thought of off the top of the workers' heads. N got on his Wario Bike and headed to the newly opened Aether Company. He crept inside and saw that the workers were Pika, Gladion, and their children, who were hard at work working the machines. Surprisingly, Junior seemed to be in charge. He was giving them orders and keeping them supervised. This amused N. But then he saw something. Gladion's Silvally, which was whacking Poke Balls across the room for fun. He immediately wanted to liberate Silvally from Gladion, but he knew he couldn't just waltz in there. So he called Gladion on the phone, hoping to distract him. "DON'T CALL ME, I'M BUSY WORKING!" Gladion yelled before swiftly hanging up. N jaw dropped because his plan didn't work. He stomped his foot on the floor and thought about what to do. He got an idea and ran over to the Apparel Shop, bought a few items, and then went to the Salon. When he came back, he walked into the Aether Company girlishly, decked in a white dress with his hair dyed blond. Everyone looked at him as if he was high. "Hi, big brother!" he said in a high-pitched, girly voice, as if he had used helium, to Gladion. Since work had halted so they could stare at N as if he was high, Gladion walked over to him. He thought his Lillie disguise was perfect. "Lillie?" Gladion asked. "Yes?" N replied. "When did you wear that Rubik's cube-looking thing?" N was dumbfounded that Gladion had noticed, but he tried to act like nothing was wrong. "Oh, this? I picked it up on the street corner." "Uh-huh. And where'd the hat come from?" N looked up at his hat, which he hadn't bothered to take off. "Uh... the Apparel Shop." "And since when did you wear pants?" "Since... since I liked pants...?" "And when'd your hair get all weird?" "Since I was born." "And your name is...?" "Natural Harmonia Gropius, but you can call me N for short-" That's when he realized he had just blown his cover. "Get out. Right now." came Junior's voice. The children all surrounded him, and he tossed his clothing off, like Team Rocket would do with one of their disguises when they revealed their identity. However, he hadn't been wearing a shirt under the Lillie dress, and so he was now only wearing boxer shorts. "PETA ISIS SAYS LIBERATE POKEMON LIBERATE THEM NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW DIE!" he screeched and tossed Sad Hauhead at the Poke Ball-making machine. However, June ate Sad Hauhead and wrote in her diary about it. N screamed like a little girl in terror. He decided to use his special attack, Derp I Am N. "DERP I AM N DERP I AM N PETA ISIS DERPING KING THRILLER DERPY NIGHT GRANDMA FARTS IN THE MAGICAL HAUHEAD GROUDON ABOMINATION OF YEET HA HA HA HA HA HIGH HEX WHEES IN DIALGA KETCHUPED OOOOOHHHHHHHHH HEAD HEAD BEEEEEEAM!" he shrieked and launched a beam of baked bean malasadas filled with impartial OMGs at the Aether family. However, Gladion blocked it and kicked N in the knee, causing him to run off, wailing. He was never seen again.

The end.
3 hours ago by Gladion Aether
earlier today, i decided to take a break from the site. i then reconsidered it and have returned
1 day ago by SSuperiority
If anyone has a legitimate shiny Regice, I’d be willing to trade. Any game works.
1 day ago by PrimalKyogre
Gladion And The Hauhead Fangirls

It was a beautiful day. Gladion was sitting in a peaceful meadow, relaxing and enjoying the sun. But then a hoard of his fangirls came running by, and he looked for a place to hide. But to his surprise, they ran right past him. He was relieved but confused. Normally they'd probably stop in the middle of a freeway just to say hello to him. He decided to follow them. He wandered around until he found a dark tower. He was sure it hadn't existed before. He knocked on the door, and it was answered by one of his fangirls. However, she slammed the door in his face. Now he was incredibly confused and opened the door because the fangirl didn't lock it. She ran upstairs, and Gladion slowly followed. He felt as if he was walking up the stairs for hours. But then he reached the top room. It was filled with Hau-related things. It even had Hau plushies. There were the fangirls, who were fangirling over Hau, who was tied to the wall. He didn't care at all for the fangirls, but decided to free Hau because they were torturing him. Hau was wailing loudly in terror, but the fangirls surprisingly heard Gladion approach them. "Why the frick are you people torturing Hau?" Gladion asked with raised eyebrows. One of the fangirls, who was dumb as a rock, yelled "HAUHEAD IS THE MAGICAL SON OF X'S COUSIN WHO HAS BEEN WORSHIPPED BY US FOR TEN YEARS!" "You were chasing me around for longer than that." Gladion scoffed. The fangirls flew into a girly idiot rage and tried to toss Gladion out a window. However, he kicked one of them, denting her high heel. She screamed as if her neck had been broken, although she most likely would've been dead if it had. They all ran around like they had lost their minds and jumped out the window, which most likely broke their bones. Gladion untied Hau, who broke down in tears like a little kid. Gladion asked him what was going on. "They tied me up and kissed me while trying to force-feed me malasadas that they had stored under a radiator!" he wailed in reply. Not even Hau liked radiator malasadas. They left the tower, but when they got out, the mob of fangirls was there. Gladion facepalmed and groaned. "GIVE US HAU RIGHT NOW YOU BIG MEANIE!" screamed one of them. "Would asking you what you took to get this high make me an even bigger meanie?" Gladion asked them. They became enraged once again and swarmed Gladion and Hau. Within minutes, Gladion had been tied upside-down to a tree. One of the fangirls stuck a cigar in his mouth for no apparent reason as they huggled Hau. "We are gathered here today to sacrifice Gladion to our great lord Hau!" said one of the fangirls. They all cheered loudly as Gladion began to curse. "Devilish incantations! We shall hear no more of them!" yelled the same fangirl, who then took the cigar out of Gladion's mouth and put a piece of tape over his mouth. They begun doing a dance and worshipping Hau, who looked as if he was traumatized for life. After twenty minutes of dancing, they were wondering why Gladion was still alive. They begun to wonder if they should burn him or throw him into the ocean to appease Hau, but then someone approached him. "Oh my Arceus! It's X's cousin, Dexter X!" screamed one of the fangirls. Dexter X looked at them like they were mentally insane. "Why exactly are you sacrificing people?" Dexter X asked. The fangirls threw themselves at his feet. "Dexter X! Please, can you help us appease your son?" Dexter X looked dumbfounded. "My son? What the frick are you talking about? I don't have a son." The fangirls' jaws all dropped and they begun to discuss the situation. "If so, then you are not Dexter X! You're an impostor!" shouted one of the fangirls. They tied Dexter X up to the same tree Gladion was tied to and put a cigar in his mouth. "Well frick." he said. Gladion said the same thing, but it was muffled by tape. The fangirls began to dance again, some of them trying to dance with Hau, whom they had knocked unconscious. Dexter X reached into his pocket and pulled out a phone. He dialed a number and begun to speak. "Hey, could you help me out? I'm tied to a tree and some Hau fangirls are trying to sacrifice me." The number was 163-6583-000, his cousin X's number. X came riding in on a Glastrier, nearly giving the fangirls heart attacks. "Why are you people trying to sacrifice my cousin?" he asked. They all cowered in terror. X got off of his Glastrier and walked over to the tree Gladion and Dexter X were tied to. He untied both of them, and Gladion got the tape off of his mouth. "He's trying to stop the ritual!" screamed one of the fangirls. Glastrier used Avalanche, which sent the fangirls running off into the hills. Hau regained consciousness. "Ugh... oh boy, I had this weird dream where there was a Pika polka and N was exploding..." he said. They all thanked X, who headed off on his Glastrier. The fangirls were never seen again, and they all lived in peace.

The end.
2 days ago by Gladion Aether
Gladion facepalmed and groaned
They left the tower, but when they got out, the mob of fangirls was there.
2 days ago by ~Dragapulse~
Gladion asked him what was going on. "They tied me up and kissed me while trying to force-feed me malasadas that they had stored under a radiator!" he wailed in reply.
2 days ago by ~Dragapulse~
Gladion untied Hau, who broke down in tears like a little kid.
2 days ago by ~Dragapulse~
They all ran around like they had lost their minds and jumped out the window, which most likely broke their bones.
2 days ago by ~Dragapulse~
X, Junior, And The Magical Cabbage

One day in a far-off land, X spotted something green and leafy. It was a cabbage, and a magical one at that. So he picked it up, hoping to harness the power of the magical cabbage. However, Junior, Pika and Gladion's first son, saw X with the magical cabbage. He walked over and asked X what it was. "It's a magcial cabbage, and I discovered it!" X shouted gleefully, like a little kid in a candy store. Junior looked long and hard at the cabbage. It was shimmering with a blue aura. He decided that he wanted the magical cabbage to give to his dad. "I want the magical cabbage, X." he said. X's face went red with anger, as if a cute girl had just crushed his foot. "This is my magical cabbage! I discovered it!" came his enraged reply. At this, Junior grew angry as well. He grabbed the cabbage, but X grabbed it back. They pulled back and forth, yelling at each other. Suddenly, the cabbage split into two, and something fell out of it: a crystal. Junior and X were sad that the cabbage split, but they both wanted the crystal now as well. So they grabbed it and fought over it, like they had with the cabbage. But when X pulled it out of Junior's grip, there was a loud thudding sound. Behind X stood a massive Hau with glowing white eyes. "I AM SAD HAUHEAD!" it bellowed, causing the very Earth to shake. They were both terrified of the massive Hau, but then it looked at X and said "I WILL KILL JUNIOR!" X grinned smugly, about to get back at Junior for fighting with him and splitting his magical cabbage open. They fought over the crystal once more as Sad Hauhead prepared to crush Junior. But Junior got it out of X's grip, and a loud screech was heard. The land begun to shake again, and a geyser sprouted out of the ground. Suddenly, a massive blue orca leapt out of the geyser and at Sad Hauhead. They begun to clash, destroying the land around them. The Kyogre, who was named Primal, Origin Pulsed Sad Hauhead. Sad Hauhead let out a scream and turned into a malasada, which was then eaten by Primal. "Well done, Sammy!" Junior congratulated Primal. "I'M NOT SAMMY!" Primal cried back. X was furious and upset. Sad Hauhead had been devoured and Junior had the crystal. It seemed hopeless for X. But then he remembered his glitch army. "GLITCHES, ASSEMBLE!" he screamed. Suddenly, a million TYs rained down from the sky with Pokemon above level 100. Junior restrained himself from swearing. "LET US AT 'EM, DEXTER X!" shouted one of the TYs. This struck a nerve for X. "CALL ME X FOR ARCEUS' SAKE!" he screamed at them. The TY shrunk down sadly. Then the rest of them charged at Junior and Primal, but Junior was clever. He gave the crystal to Primal, and he suddenly turned into a Primal Kyogre. That crystal was actually the Blue Orb. Rain fell across the land. Primal unleashed Thunders, Water Spouts, Origin Pulses, and Ice Beams, which destroyed the TYs and their over level 100 Pokemon. All that was left was X. X was now slightly frightened. But then he grabbed the remains of the magical cabbage and ate them. Suddenly, he grew into a massive Greninja and screamed "I AM X AND YOU SHALL DIE!" He turned into an Ash Greninja due to the magical cabbage's extreme power. He unleashed Water Shurikens at Junior, but Primal used Water Spout, destroying the shurikens. Then Primal Ice Beamed his feet so he couldn't move. Fight as he might, X couldn't break free. But he figured he didn't need his legs to beat Primal and Junior. He then used Dark Pulse, which landed a critical hit on Primal. But Primal scoffed and used Thunder. Electricity coursed through X's body, and he turned back into a human again and fell to the ground, fainted. Junior high-fived Primal's flipper as the Primal Reversion wore off. And Junior headed off home as Primal rested in his underwater cave. And X? He tried to sue Junior but it didn't work out. And they all lived happily ever after.

The end.
2 days ago by Gladion Aether
Want to help me evolve my Shiny Clamperl at some point?
4 days ago by Porygon-Zangoose