Wall for BottomlessSea (page 83)

Parlor Swipple's Other Attempt At Getting A New Boyfriend Because She Has No Life - Part 3


"SO PARLOR SWIPPLE BROKE THE DORP UP WITH ME AND IS CHASING LUKE AROUND AND I NEED YOUR HELP TO GET HER BACK TOGETHER WITH ME" N said. "And... why should I do that?" "BECAUSE IT'S A DERPING NICE THING TO DO" "That already makes me not want to do it." Pika replied. N jaw dropped. "YOU DARN FROCKY WHEE DORP HEAD I'M ASKING FOR YOUR HELP" "I heard." "THEN HELP ME DERP" "Not that simple." N thought for a while about ways to bribe her, but realized there wasn't anything he had that she'd like. He was about to ask her to help him again, but was smacked in the head by a pan as Gill approached Pika's house. He fell to the ground with an ear-splitting 'DORP' and Gill waved in a friendly manner. "Hey, Pika, everyone was impressed with your performance. Aside from Parlor Swipple, of course, but she barely even counts as a person. Anyway, everyone's hoping you could perform again." "Ooh, really?! Tell me more!" And then Pika and Gill waltzed off, chattering nonstop. N had overheard this and was now thinking. A bent-over lightbulb that illuminated with a baked bean color appeared over his head and he ran off to go find Parlor Swipple. Pika rehersed her act, and by the time it was the day to perform, she was ready. In the town square, people were gathered. It was time for Pika's act. Of course, it was Pika singing and dancing with the boys. The Gelato Mine music clicked on as she begun. "Clouds cover the moon, my eyes close again... forced to dream of things that are darker than the night... I'm scared without you, without you, without you... please come for me, I'm waiting for you... I can't stay here, I can't last much longer, so please come, please come and take me back..." Parlor Swipple and N were disgusted by her song, which obviously meant it was good. But what really disgusted Parlor Swipple was that Luke was up there with Gill and Pika. "Coldness seeps in through the walls, not a life to be seen... I can feel myself shivering as rain pours onto the ground... please take me from the cold, please take me from the darkness, take from this place, take me back... let me stay in your arms, let me see your face, take me back, take me back, to what I know..." Then the song ended and they bowed as the crowd went wild. "DOPR I'M A MUCH BETTERER PERFORMANCER THAN HER" Parlor Swipple screamed. "INDEED DORP THESE PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND" N yelled. Parlor Swipple marched up onstage and stared Luke straight in the face, and the sight of her face made him cringe. "PIKA IS A PEE HED YOU DERPING LIKE MY MUSIC RIGHT" "Uh no actually your music the worst screechy piece of garbage I've ever heard in my life." Luke replied with a smile. Parlor Swipple couldn't believe her ears that she apparently had which was doubtful judging by her songs. "OMPEE DORP LUKE I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU" Luke, Gill, and Pika glanced at each other. "How can you break up with me when we're not in a relation-" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MY DORPING FEELINGS WERE HORTEEEEEEEEEEED I'M GETTING BACK TOGETHER WITH N" N then had a breakdancing spaz seizure upstage and him and Parlor Swipple kissed as the boys debated poking their eyes out and Pika nearly vomited. Then Gill's trusty metal horse drove down N's throat and another drove down Parlor Swipple's and they were dragged into space and into the moon before sadly crashing into X's moon house which made him groan and facepalm because he still couldn't escape the drama. "So, Pika..." Luke began as Pika casually ate a plate of mac and cheese, plate, fork, and all. As she crunched on the plate she glanced at him in acknowledgement. "I wanted to say that I... I LIKE-" But before he could finish his sentence and ask Pika out, Gill hit him with a pan and stole his axe for no reason before running off. Pika then shrugged and stole his bandana and paraded around with it. He eventually woke up in a state of mass confusion while wondering who took his bandana.

The end.

Parlor Swipple's Other Attempt At Getting A New Boyfriend Because She Has No Life - Part 2


It was a festival, and like at any festival, Pika was bored. She was so bored, in fact, that she decided to make the festival a bit more entertaining. When Parlor Swipple somehow managed to find the festival, she saw people crowded around Pika. Pika was playing a keyboard with one foot by bouncing on it, using her other foot for an accordian, playing the piano with one hand, the drums with the other, and also playing a harmonica. Somehow, the song sounded like Gelato Mine in a way. Everyone looked to be enjoying it. Except for Parlor Swipple, who was furious that Luke was there and watching the show. In fact, he had a front-row seat. There were no rows or seats but whatever he was the closest person by. "YOU DERPING PEE HED" Parlor Swipple screamed, marching up to Pika in the middle of her performance and trying to whack her foot with a pan. Of course, she kept missing by a long shot, but then the keyboard fell apart and Pika stopped. "Ah! My keyboard!" she cried. "I'M MUCH BETTERER AT ENTERTAINING THAN YOU ARE YOU DORP BREATH" Pika was rather ticked, but said "OK, fine! If you're so good at entertaining that you have to stop the other performers, then show all of us!" "I DERPING WILL PEE HED" She then ran off and came back to start something that couldn't be called a performance. She was blasting fourteen of her songs at once and singing a fifteenth song while vomiting baked beans on peoples' shoes and playing ads in the background while slamming her head into the pavement. "This sucks! Boo!" Luke yelled as Gill charged at her with a pan before hitting her head with it so many times that he shaped her head into the word 'LAME'. Her head returned to normal and she gave him looks. She hit him with a can of baked beans, but he was unfazed and hit her head with the pan a few more times. This went on for a while, with Parlor Swipple's head being shaped into a wide variety of things, from a wilting flower to a speaker to a Marill. Pika then began to make baby noises for no reason and blasted a Bau Triller remix as an epic RPG-style battle broke out between Gill and Parlor Swipple. It was all about timing, like in Super Mario RPG, and Pika clapped her hands every time Gill consecutively hit Parlor Swipple with the pan. She even got Luke to join in as everyone enjoyed the spectacle of Parlor Swipple getting panned in the head. "Nice! Good! Great! Wonderful! Perfect! Perfect! Perfect!" were the excited chants as Gill pulled off fourteen consecutive pan attacks. Then it was the quite mangled Parlor Swipple's turn, and she tossed a can of baked beans at Gill. However, he dodged. "Miss!" Luke laughed as they all began to laugh at how horrible her aim was. She was so mad, but then Gill unleashed a special move where he rode his pots and pans horse with train wheels for legs and feet that Parlor Swipple had planned to smooch down Parlor Swipple's throat. Of course, he hopped off of it before he was eaten, and now Parlor Swipple had a horse thingy in her stomach that drove her off a cliff. Gill did a victory dance as he gained enough EXP to level up. Everyone decided that it would now be the Parlor Swipple Got Driven Off A Cliff By Gill's Metal Horse Thingy Festival and began to celebrate again as Pika got a new keyboard. N had been watching the whole time, and he knew that Parlor Swipple wouldn't give up on Luke just because Gill had driven a metal horse down her throat. So after the festival ended, he rather creepily stalked Pika back to her house, and then knocked on the door. She opened it, but when she saw N with his Julius haircut, she slammed the door. "OPEN THE DERPING DOOR YOU PEE HED I NEED YOUR HELP" he yelled. "My help to do what?! Help you graduate from Kosh Jool Academy?!" Pika yelled back from behind the door. "NO IT'S ABOUT PARLOR SWIPPLE AND THAT DORPING FROCKY WHEE HEAD LUKE" Pika decided that N was far too stupid to be decieving her, so she opened the door and glared at him, hands on her hips. "All right, get explaining."

To be continued...

Parlor Swipple's Other Attempt At Getting A New Boyfriend Because She Has No Life - Part 1


Parlor Swipple was peeking under bed cushions and injecting grapefruit juice into her eyeballs when she saw something 'horrific'. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHJJJJJJJJEEEEEEEEEE DORP A LOVE LETTER" she screamed. It was adressed to N. She opened it and it said "i thnk u shuld ues dwagen scent on ur migikerp" and it was signed 'Imaginary RMT Noob'. Of course, she flipped out. "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN YOU'RE A PEE BRIAN I'M GOING TO TURD ON YOUR BAKED BEANS AND BREAK THE DERP UP WITH YOU" N then walked in and went "DERRRRRRR-RRRRR-RRRRRRRRRR-RRR-RRRRRRRRR-RRRPEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and ate himself before kerploding into oblivion. Parlor Swipple remembered her last attempt at getting a boyfriend and how it had ended horribly for her. She then decided that repeating what she did last time was a perfect idea and went into the Harvest Moon dimension. Pika, Gill, and Luke were playing Truth or Dare and embarrassing the frick out of each other. Gill was just getting ready to dare Luke to do something crazy. "Hmm... I dare you to-" "HI DERPLINGS" Parlor Swipple screamed while trying to make herself sound attractive, which caused nearby cats to drown themselves in boiling water and/or make fish eat them. "Oh great." Gill said. Pika casually sung songs about snobby fake friends which tempted the boys to sing along with her as Parlor Swipple went on. "I NEED A NEW BOYFRIEND AGAIN DERP WHO WANTS TO SIGN UP" She was completely ignored, however. "OK I'LL PICK DERP" Then she stood there for five years, by which time Pika and the boys had left. And when she finally decided on Luke again, they were gone and she ended up screaming at Toby. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH YOU ABOMBIDEABLE OR HOWEVER YOU SPELL IT PEE HED YOU SCAREDED OFF MY BOYFRIEND DORP" Toby, however, couldn't understand a word she said and walked away. She then ran in two million and seventy-eight circles before deciding to track down Luke instead of running in two million and seventy-eight more circles. She yeeted herself over Mt. Gelato for no reason and then yeeted herself to Pika's house before promptly falling through the roof and almost on top of Pika's cat. No one but the cat and Parlor Swipple were there. So then she burrowed for some reason to Dale's Carpentry and broke in through the window with a baked bean bazooka. "OMPEE LUKE I WANT TO MARRY YOU SO I CAN DERPILY SERENADE YOU AND DUNK YOU IN THE TOILET" Luke imagined that and nearly threw up as Bo and Dale gave Parlor Swipple 'wtf are you on' looks. She grabbed Luke's arm and tried to tow him away, but he cut her hand off with his axe and jumped out the window. Parlor Swipple magically grew another hand and chased after Luke, but then noticed Gill. "OMDERP GILL I WANT TO SMOOCH THE TRAIN HORSE YOU MADE OF POTS AND PANS" "You want to what now?" he asked. But before Parlor Swipple could traumatize him by trying to kiss him, N ran up to her. "POOLOR SWIPPEE I DIED MY HAIR JULIUS LET'S GET BACK THE DERP TOGETHER AGAIN" N begged. "NO YOU DORPING PEETH HED I'M GOING TO GET A NEW BOYFRIEND WHO APPRECIATES MY SINGING FARTS" she replied stubbornly. In the middle of their argument, Parlor Swipple noticed that Gill had disappeared. In fact, he had disappeared ages ago, but Parlor Swipple's tiny brain that she may or may not have was just now noticing it. "CATCH YOUR TURDS LATER YOU DORP HED" she screamed and ran off in the opposite direction Gill had left as she thought it was the right way. N began to mournfully sing 'I Have A Knee Made Of Pee Like My Brain And My Eyes', but then decided that he needed a plan to make Parlor Swipple get back together with him again. And he realized that it might just take one of his mortal enemies to do it.

To be continued...

(countable and uncountable, plural PKs)

Initialism of preacher's kid, pastor's kid or priest's kid: the child of a clergyman and/or clergywoman, especially Protestant. quotations ▼
(parapsychology) Initialism of psychokinesis.
(video games, role-playing games) Initialism of player kill, player killing or player killer.
(computing, databases) Initialism of primary key.
(American football) Initialism of placekicker.
(US, soccer) Initialism of penalty kick.
(biochemistry) Initialism of protein kinase.
(informal, pharmacology) Initialism of painkiller. quotations ▼
Synonyms    Edit
(preacher's kid): child of the manse
Derived terms    Edit
(player kill): PKer
Anagrams    Edit
KP


Definition of pk

Too repetitive

But I retired

I reached 1800 elo in National Dex AG before

Harvest Moon wiki: "This article is about Luke, a character from Animal Parade. You may be looking for Luke, a character from Tree of Tranquility."
Me: "Take a wild guess buster."

Yeah, that's my favorite too. :3

I imagined Selena trying to get into a romantic relationship with Luke, and Pika flirting with Luke just to tick her off. And then Tom and Jerry-like chaos erupts and long story short Gill runs Selena and her horse made of Parlor Swipple albums over with his horse made of pots and pans with train wheels for legs and feet.

"Yeah, N rangers: Pee was pretty dull" -PrimalKyogre 2021