I like playing as Gau.
Also, the villain would only sacrifice the world to save you if said villain WANTED to save you. Usually villains aren't particularly friendly and would likely let you die unless you were special to them. Which sounds like a bad romance fanfic honestly. Not to mention that quite a few villains wanna take over the world, so sacrificing it (not the people in it, the world itself) just to save some random person they apparently like isn't really worth it.
And it's true, heroes aren't always respected despite their good deeds. However, that should be very unimportant. Who cares if people like you or not? They might be ungrateful brats, but heroes don't need respect to be heroes. If you're a hero, you should likely focus more on saving the world, defeating the villain, or whatever it is you do, not whine that "OHEMGEE PEEPOLES DONT RESPECT ME BOO-HOO I SADDETH". That's a sign that you care more about your image than you should. And yeah, you'd WANT to be respected, but it shouldn't be of the highest priority. As for the villain, let's not forget that, to make people fear you, and therefore respect you or whatever, you have to actually BE scary. How are you gonna do that? Kill a bunch of people in public? Bomb a town? Take control of wherever you are? No matter what you do, the hero's gonna come after you. So you have to kill him. But can you? Just like it doesn't really matter if people respect the hero, it doesn't really matter if people fear the villain. Sure, you could use their fear to your advantage and, say, make them give you secrets or use them to take control or something. But can't you just... kill them and hack into computers or something? Do you really NEED fear and respect? Not really in most cases. What you need are the powers and strength to kill the hero so that he can't stop you in your tracks. And when was the last time THAT worked out?
In short, respect is unimportant and being a villain isn't that easy when the good guys are trying to murder you.
May 26, 2022
by
Gau
"Ah, Mr. Dalrymple, from the classic episode "Murder At Buttnaked Beach.""
"On the other hand, the villains include exciting characters like Satipo the evil Peruvian and everyone's favorite baddie, Nazi(TM)."
"Tad plays the Throw Tad In The Incinerator card. Tad takes the lead."
"Here, take the ceremonial protractor and tell me about your father."
"If you look at it through the special clown glasses, it tells you to kill your parents."
"Another Star Wars poster for the Russian market, in which Vader is some kind of robotic disco puma."
"Poland makes our list for the second time by portraying Chinatown as the fantastic tale of an uptight middle-aged woman tormented by Pedro the mischievous, nostril-stabbing elf."
"Choke slamming a shark and "Mega Sound"? This is how you sell a freaking movie, kids."
"Having just watched the first few minutes of the film before slapping their poster together, the Japanese marketing department renamed Army of Darkness to Captain Supermarket because, you know, Ash worked in one."
"But here's the problem: Once audiences have actually seen the movie and realize it's not actually about humans landing on a monkey-headed globe in space, how do you do posters for the sequels?"
"Every time he goes heroing, he must have his girlfriend break up with him. Watch out evil doers, when The Hulk updates his Facebook status to "single" you best lay low."
"Seriously, can the Japanese even so much as head to the 7-Eleven for a pack of smokes without transforming into a giant robot?"
"Apparently the concept of revenge doesn't exist in Japan, but ancient cave demons are plentiful."
"Future attempts like Ms. Mario Bros. or Ms. Call of Duty 3 had no such luck."
"To be fair, vests were very popular in pirate times."
"Like if there's no spoon, what is this called?"
"The plot is about as engaging as watching a foot race between two convenience stores."
"This ad is trying to encourage young girls either to look as pretty as their dolls by using the Scotch Hair Set Tape or to start mounting and displaying their enemies as a warning to others."
"The second cover makes it look like the Pac-People were brutally slaughtered by giant, lightning-spewing robots. Are Pac-Man and his wife the sole survivors of the robot apocalypse? Is that why they nurture such terrible pill addictions, lost in the maze of their own madness, hounded by the ghosts of their loved ones who died in the uprising? And also cherries?"
"No, this bootleg company wanted to create something special, so they crammed all the great fighters into their unauthorized rip-off game: Ryu, Chun-Li, Goku, Bowser's BDSM-obsessed ginger cousin, cross-eyed Sonic, indiscernible naked people enveloped in flames, and the shadowy, disembodied head of Mario cosplaying as a sinister M. Bison-type character ... right next to M. Bison. That had to be an awkward conversation."
"It's not about GunSmokey the Bear and a mentally unstable former marine in a Fievel mask shooting down attack helicopters together."
"It's a crude mod of NES shooter Heavy Barrel, where Chip and Dale complete classic Rescue Rangers missions like "DESTROY ENEMY'S UNDERGROUND ARTILLERY BASE" using laser guns and flamethrowers."
"Or else the cast of Jackass was trying to escape a terrifying Dr. Moreau-esque island full of half-beast, half-rapper abominations."
"For most of the world, Grand Theft Auto is about gangsters doing gangster stuff -- you know, like going bowling, doing yoga, and planning fun dates. In Syria, it's about thug life albino Superman, Zorro, Spider-Man, Batman, and the Mask brutally curb-stomping police officers. As far as we can tell, this is a real game, in the sense that someone dropped acid and modded San Andreas to reflect the things their DVD collection started screaming at them."
"Sun-bleached Doro the Exploda luggage spills from them onto the sidewalk, and inside are narrow corridors filled with one-size-fits-all wedding dresses, bras for women who never plan on taking their shirt off, and "I Heart San Francisco" snow globes from back when it was called Pangaea."
"Hold on a second. Are you telling me that watching a maniac elephant smash into things is actually how Chinese people teach their babies to drive!? Because last week in a parking lot, they told me I was racist when I screamed that exact thing at them."
"Forgive me if I'm skeptical of child psychology done by a sweatshop's copy writer, but I don't think there's a link between musical aptitude and an elephant monster playing "Camptown Races" with a car horn."
"In fact, after putting in some batteries and watching AMVSING TRUCK sit in one place and have a noisy plastic seizure, I'd say "The head of motorcycle will swing when the hand shaking!" is the most elegant way to describe it."
"She charged me $8.99 for a driverless plastic car-like shape that inches slowly forward until it hits something. Oh, damn it. Now that I think about it, that condescending b*tch might have been right."
"This doll costs $14.99 and looks like it was shipped here by way of fistfight."
"First, toy train sets are the direct opposite of tough. Owning a toy train set is like mailing a picture of you breastfeeding to your enemies."
"After a few fights, Omega Supreme will be the only Autobot that both turns into and needs a wheelchair ramp."
May 26, 2022
by
Gau
