Incorrect Quote Generator Lines, Part 3
Danny, driving Giru and Sees: So how was your day?
Giru: We almost got surprise adopted!
Danny: What?
Sees: We almost got kidnapped.
Danny: Oh, okay.
Danny: *slams on the brakes* WAIT WHAT?!
Danny: If Giru and I were drowning, who would you save?
Sees: You two can't swim?
Giru: It's a hypothetical question, Sees! who would you save?
Sees: My time and effort.
Danny, texting Giru: Giru! Help I'm being kidnapped
Sees: Where are you?
Danny: I'm with some strange person. In a car. Help.
Giru: I'll call Sees.
Sees, answering his cell: Y'ello?
Giru: Where's Danny? He texted me that he was being kidnapped.
Sees: Danny? Whaddya mean, he's right next to me-
Sees:
Sees: I'll call you back. *hangs up*
Sees: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN"T THAT BAD!
Danny: WHO ARE YOU?!
Danny: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness.
Giru: Next time you're working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex's house down. You can do it. I believe in you.
Sees: There were so many mixed messages in that I can't-
Danny: While I'm gone, Giru, you're in charge.
Giru: Yes!!!
Danny, whispering: Sees, you're secretly in charge.
Sees: Obviously.
Danny: I told Giru her ears flush when she lies.
Sees: Why?
Danny: Look.
Danny: Hey Giru! Do you love us?
Giru, covering her ears: No.
Sees:
Danny: Naturally, we are on the cutting edge of technology.
Giru, amazed: Wow...
Sees, to Giru: Well what does that mean?
Giru: I don't know.
Giru, to Danny: What does that mean?
Danny: If you had to choose between Giru and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?
Sees: That depends, how much money are we talking about?
Giru: Sees!
Danny: 63 cents.
Sees: I'll take the money.
Giru: SEES!!!
Danny: Don't worry, I got a plan.
Giru: Alright.
Danny: TraitorSayWhat?
Sees: Excuse me?
Danny: What?
Giru:
Danny:
Danny: No wait-
Danny: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?
Giru: How am I supposed to know?
Sees: You say, as if we don't use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.
Giru: *sighs*
Giru: You wouldn't be trapped.
Danny: Why are you on the floor?
Giru: I'm depressed.
Giru: Also I was stabbed, can you get Sees, please.
Danny, trying to ask Giru out: Would you like to stay for dinner?
Sees: WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOREVER?
Danny: Sees, can I talk to you for a second?
Sees: Yeah, what's up? Lemme guess. You and Giru are having problems and you want me to teach you how to kiss?
Danny: What? No, stop that. I know how to kiss. I've read books.
Danny: I trust Giru.
Sees: You think she knows what she's doing?
Danny: I wouldn't go that far.
*The squad is talking about what it'd be like to open up a homemade Pokemon gym*
Danny, joking: Giru's just sitting at the end, juggling- fushigi-ing 2 glass balls, in super tight pants, just waiting for their kid delivery once they best her minions.
Giru: Well they would be Pokeballs. And also it's not a kid delivery. There's no ****ing guarantee that a kid that comes into the beginning of my crucible makes it to the end of it undefeated.
Giru: In fact, I'm gonna stack this gym! With ****in' pros!
Giru: It's- It's gonna be brutal. It's gonna be a torture gym.
Sees: Well- Well what's the theme? Are you like- is it a bug theme, or like-
Giru: YEAH, SEES. UH- UH- UH- UH YEAH SEES. IM GONNA OPEN UP A BUG TYPE POKEMON GYM. YOU IDIOT.
Giru: YEAH THAT'S WHAT I WANT. BECAUSE I WANNA GIVE- I WANNA **** OUT BADGES FOR EVERY HAM AND EGGER THAT COMES TO MY FRONT DOOR.
Danny: *Cracking up*
Giru: YEAH, SEES. 'Uhh, go Caterpie! >~>' That's me, you ****ING imbecile. 'Yeah go- uhhh- d-do your best, Kakuna!'
Giru: WHAT ARE YOU ****ING TALKING ABOU- Yeah a ~bug type~ gym.
Sees:
Danny: Okaaay-
Sees: Alright, um, I'm gonna go. I've embarrassed myself.
Danny: Maybe fire? Fire type?
Sees: Yeah fire-based? Like- have fires?
Giru: Yeah, yeah I'll probably just- That's a good idea Danny I'll probably just do a fire type one... SO THAT ONE KID WITH ONE BLASTOISE CAN **** UP MY WHOLE SHOP.
Giru: KILLED ALL OF US WITH ONE BLASTOISE, HUH? WOW. **** I SHOULD'VE-
Sees: Just do rock, then! Just do rock type!
Giru, voice dripping with contempt: The same Blastoise...
Danny: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste
Giru: We got spring water
Danny: NO.
Sees: with EXTRA minerals
Giru: it's like licking a stalagmite
Danny: DON'T COME HOME.
Sees: Mmmmm cave water
Danny: Giru, what do IDK, LY, and TTYL mean?
Giru: I don't know, love you, talk to you later
Danny: Ok, I love you too, I'll just ask Sees.
Danny: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me.
Giru: Okay, but in my defense, Sees bet me 50 cents I couldn't drink all that shampoo.
Danny: That's not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!
Danny: Looking left cause you don't treat me right
Giru: Looking right because you left
Sees: Looking up cause you let me down
Penston: Looking down cause you ****ed up
Volt: What is wrong with you guys
Danny: I'm an idiot.
Giru:
Sees:
Penston:
Volt:
Danny:
Giru: If you're waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.
Danny: What did you guys get in your yearbook?
Giru: 'Prettiest Smile'
Sees: 'Nicest Personality'
Penston: 'Most likely to start a bar fight'
Volt: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'
Danny: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife?
Giru: Rude.
Sees: That's fair.
Penston: Not again.
Volt: Are you going to want this back?
Danny: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one!
Giru: Tubular AF!
Sees: Mood to the max!
Penston, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it.
Volt, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she's a square.
May 27, 2023
by
Gau
